Monday, August 2, 2010

Earth Shattering

There are moments that change everything forever.  I had one today.
You can feel them coming sometimes.  All weekend, I was antsy as hell, impatient, pissy, unable to sleep.  I told my roommate that I felt something was near, something life changing, something positive.  I was right.  Someone I love very much, a lost family member whom I haven't heard from in seven years, wrote me a letter.  I went for my walk and when I came home, casually opened the mailbox...and there it was.  He'd been gone so long, sworn I'd never hear from him again.  It was more than mere moodiness.  He'd been in very bad trouble for a long time and when he vanished, I didn't know if he'd live or die.  Apparently, he lived.  Not only that, he's doing well.  Of all the deaths and suicides and murders from addiction in my family, I worried about him the most.  And he's alive.  Clean.  Actually reaching out...to me!  This is an earth shattering, life changing day.  The one who lived, my own personal wizard, my own beloved prodigal.  Don't think I'll get much sleep tonight but I don't give a damn.  I'm literally buzzing with adrenalin right now.  For anybody out there who's lost the will to reconnect, who is scared to try, who's tried but been rejected: hang in there.  Don't stop believing in magic and miracles, no matter what.  They do exist.  Today proves that for me.  In the words of Winston Churchill, "Never, never, never quit."  Don't ever stop believing in yourself.  Don't ever stop believing you can overcome anything.  You can.  I'm dancing on air right now and feel like I've been hit by a truck simultaneously.  Whew!  Right now, I'm going to create, the best thing for relieving tension.  Art is the ultimate balm.  Be well.  

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